Mmm… lovely Duff
Firstly, quick pointers for those of you who for some reason or other don’t follow football in the English Premiership. Football is the world’s best game. Americans call it soccer, but they’re wrong. They just call it that because they’ve got this game, which is a bit like rugby, only with more padding, big helmets, cheerleaders and gazillions of lines drawn all over the pitch that they call football. Shucks, let ‘em call their game football if they like. I’m not going to humour them by calling ours soccer though.
Secondly, the best team in the entire history of football is Newcastle United. Cynics may be able to point to reasons why they believe other teams are better — Barcelona have more supporters, Manchester United have won more trophies, Chelsea have got more money, and Brazil have won more World Cups. To those cynics I say, you’re entitled to your opinion, and I’ll have mine.
So, what’s happened? Well Newcastle United have signed Damien Duff from Chelsea for £5 million. Fantastic. He’s actually a very talented player, and apart from the fact he was running towards the end of his contract, I can’t see why they would want to let him go for only £5m.
Having said that, following in the traditions of various Newcastle players — Dyer, Bellamy, Shearer, Dyer again, Woodgate, Woodgate again, Dyer again, Bellamy again, Dyer again, Shearer again, Dyer again and now Owen, I expect him to spend most of his time injured. I really hope he doesn’t though, because he’s a talented player, he’s great to watch and I think he could go on and be a real asset to the time, and I’d like to offer him a big welcome to Newcastle United and to the North-East. Hope you like it up here!
But at the risk of being a fly in the ointment can I just double check that we’re not going to hack off Zog on the Tyne (also known as Charles N’Zogbia) who’s been a rapidly improving player over the last couple of years and I think is capable of making the French squad? Can I also check that we’re still planning on buying a centre-forward? Only we appear to be running out of those at the moment…
But of course I should never doubt the man-marvel that is Glenn Roeder. I found myself doubting him only last week, wondering how he was so confident that we’d beat Lillestrom away after being held to a 1-1 draw in the home leg.
Oh no, that’s Europe going to be over for another year. I can’t cope with this. Why hasn’t he bought any strikers? It’s going to be a tricky match over thereThe Inside Of My Head, Last Saturday
And of course we comfortably beat them three nil, to take our place in the UEFA Cup for this season. Hurrah! Still, I’m sure like all managers I’ll find myself doubting him more than just the once. Whereas I never doubted Souness at all. No, I had no doubt at all he was taking us in the wrong direction.
So, good luck Glenn, sorry for doubting you. Nice to see you Damien, but I hope you have a few more team mates before the season starts. And nighty night to the rest of you.
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