I was a little alarmed to come across this photograph the other day. It’s got my son in it. Well, more specifically, it’s got my son in a big floppy hat, a deep red coat and holding something white and rather blurred.

Except rather worryingly, from the costume to the pose to the poise and facial expression, it looks like he’s playing some “Dandy” or posing for some piece of Regency portraiture. Hmm. Actually, come to think of it, if it wasn’t for the wrinkles (that my son hasn’t got), I’d say he was a dead ringer for this photo of Quentin Crisp.

I’m sure when he’s older, he’ll thank me for the comparison.

No?