Tuesday, January 5, 2010 7:44 | Filed in Faith & Forteana

I’m not a great believer in astrology. Well, I say that, but that’s not entirely accurate. I actually think it’s a complete load of utter tosh. I’m prepared to accept that, for various seasonal reasons, it might be plausible that you are statistically more likely to have a particular personality trait if you were born at a given time of year, but as far as the daily/weekly/yearly horoscopes which are featured in various magazines and newspapers, I am firmly of the opinion that it is a load of complete and utter garbage, and it’s all about fleecing the credulous out of their money. At least, that’s what my spirit guide told me.

But that’s just my opinion. There might be something in it. After all, Nancy Reagan believed in it. And surely it’s likely that one-twelfth of the world’s population will be experiencing pretty much the same set of circumstances at any given time, isn’t it?

So in the interests of fairness, and since someone sent me a link to one of these horoscopes, I’ve decided to take a look at what my horoscopes say for 2010…

Who Prediction Vagueness Likelihood of alternate
Penny Thornton [1] launchers to success or ending of existing long standing edifices in June Extraordinarily high Would help if I knew what the prediction was about
Penny Thornton [2] This is not a year to play fast and loose with your health Low (but Barnum) What are the chances of anyone predicting that this is a year when you should deliberately take risks with your health?
Neil Spencer [1] Your birthday month is a delight. Low Well, it does have my birthday in it, so it’s likely to be fairly upbeat
Neil Spencer [2] In August and September you can forge an important business alliance and/or have your head turned by a romantic interest. High — doesn’t say ‘will do’, is ‘might’ No idea

I did have the intention of including more predictions than this, but was prevented somewhat by there being a lot of talk about how it was the first time for seventy five years that I would find Jupiter in Uranus, and much less on not ridiculously over qualified predictions such as this one:

Jupiter ensures your luck is in and that most of what happens will be for the best, providing you watch the usual provisos where this expansive planet is concerned, like showing a little caution and keeping your feet somewhere near the ground.Astrology Wizard (Aries, 2010)

In other words then, my luck is in, except where it isn’t. I might form a new business alliance or romantic interest in August or September — or I might not; something I don’t quite understand is due to happen in June, and it’s not a year to be taking up Russian Roulette. Well, thank goodness I’ve found that out. I don’t know how I could have possibly faced 2010 without that information.

If anyone actually gives a toss — or can find a horoscope which actually has testable predictions in it, I might revisit this later in the year.

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3 Comments to Orrorscowp

  1. mark says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 1:27 pm

    if you read the horoscopes in any newspaper / magazine on any day of the year for any star sign you basically get; financial luck on the horizon (as long as you don’t go taking chances with your money), making a new beneficial acquaintance and if you don’t start a new relationship then your existing one will remain strong / get stronger.

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