Archive for the ‘Funnies’ Category

Auto-tune the news

Wednesday, April 29, 2009 20:30 22 Comments

[First seen over at Why, that's delightful, this is auto-tune the news.] And it’s silly, bizarre, and most importantly brilliant. Enjoy. I think schmoyoho’s You Tube channel is well worth keeping a close eye on…

This was posted under category: Funnies

Friday Joke: Steriods [Rude]

Friday, April 10, 2009 7:20 18 Comments

Two weightlifters are chatting to one another. “I’ve been taking all these new steroids,” says Joe. “But they’ve had some weird side effects. I’ve grown an extra cock.” “Steroids?” says his mate Jim. “Anabolic?” “No,” says Joe. “Just the extra cock.” [Thanks again to Walshy for this one]

This was posted under category: Funnies

Doner Card: Please Eat My Kebab (National Donor Day)

Tuesday, April 7, 2009 17:30 5 Comments

It’s National Donor Day, to celebrate and commemorate those people who give blood, or donate organs after their death and keep other people going. It’s a good cause, so I thought it worthy of mentioning on the blog. However, what with me being, well … me, I thought the best way to handle such a [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies, Science

The April Fools Collection

Wednesday, April 1, 2009 18:24 23 Comments

I’ve always liked April Fools news stories. The best ones are the ones which seem vaguely plausible, at least until you’re halfway into the article, so you’re halfway through reading them before you start asking yourself “wait, what’s today’s date again?”. I remember a great one from the Evening Chronicle about Durham signing Loof Lirpa, [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies

My €5 Ray-bans were fakes!

Saturday, March 21, 2009 9:30 27 Comments

I don’t have a category for stupidity, but it’s things like this that make me think maybe I ought to have one. Particularly since I could put my post about my previous post about the cocaine smuggling girls in it. Anyway, back to the new idiotic travellers. Found over at The Telegraph, Telegraph Travel — [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies, Travel

Gym Machine

Wednesday, March 11, 2009 0:08 21 Comments

I’ve just been to the gym. I noticed that they had a new machine in there, so I thought I’d give it a go, as no-one else was using it. I thought I’d be quite careful, and I only used it for half an hour, but even that was enough for me to start feeling [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies

The Osberts 2009

Monday, February 23, 2009 20:57 24 Comments

Well, as I am sure anyone who has been anywhere near a TV in the last day or so will realise, there were some quite high-profile film awards on the other night, called the Osberts or something like that. I didn’t really catch all of the coverage, but there’s only a certain amount of times [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies, Life

Circus Circus

Sunday, February 15, 2009 9:38 21 Comments

How do you kill a circus?You go for the juggler Two cannibals are just finishing eating a circus. One turns to the other and says “Hey — does this clown taste funny to you?”. Did you hear about the clown who was employed him in a chocolate factory making M & Ms? They had to [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies

Sock It To Me, Baby

Thursday, January 22, 2009 9:07 2 Comments

(with thanks to the lovely LW, who keeps me well supplied with jokes by text) A man wakes up one morning with the most awful hangover. It feels like he’s had some small mammal die in his mouth the previous night, although that’s probably from the kebab; his head is pounding with a solid resounding [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies

Data Mishaps

Tuesday, December 23, 2008 12:32 2 Comments

No, this is not the usual sort of data mishap. No one has lost any more USB sticks recently. Well, at least not since Leeds Council lost a stick with the unencrypted details of 5,000 children including the names, dates of birth, ethnicity, addresses and telephone numbers, child protection and state benefit information. Or since [...]

This was posted under category: Funnies, Technology